Appreciating Systems for Success in Everyday Activities
When I was actively raising children, there were two weekly tasks I dreaded the most: grocery shopping and laundry.
Both tasks had to be done regularly and seemed pointless on some level because it never felt like I made any progress.
Every week I’d go to the grocery store and buy nearly the same things I bought last week. Then it would all be gone, and I’d have to buy it all over again.
Also each week, I’d have to do the kids' laundry. Similarly to grocery shopping, it was nearly always the same clothes every week that would have to be washed, dried, folded, and put away. (The putting away was left primarily to the kids once they were old enough to put it away, although it often just stayed in their baskets, sigh.) As with the groceries, it seemed repetitive and boring.
These tasks just felt fruitless, except both were necessary for daily life to function in our house. Without doing these tasks, there would have been no food and no clean clothes, which would eventually be a new problem to solve.
Activities to take care of yourself can sometimes seem like additional chores that need to be done.
It can feel onerous and unnecessary when you already have so much to do. But without continuous repetition and a system, you forget to engage in the activities that you KNOW help you handle life better and even feel better.
This is why systems are the way to create the life you want rather than goals. Goals are one and done. Now what?
Systems keep you going from one thing to the next, getting the essential tasks done as well as the ones that are for your benefit.
Let’s say you want to start a regular exercise program. When are you going to do it during your regular day? When you feel like it? (You will rarely, if ever, feel like it. I’ve spent entire days not exercising.) Unless you have a system for doing it, your brain will usually talk you out of it.
Oh, maybe the first week you’ll get yourself to do it, feeling motivated by the newness of the plan or the goal, but soon your brain will suggest that you don’t feel like it right now, that you have too much to do, that you don’t have the energy for it.
The system doesn’t have to be complicated. Just a simple after I do this (get up, get home, get done with work) I will do that (exercise) can be enough. If there’s a lot of resistance, then start with a smaller step, like putting on workout clothes until it becomes the thing you regularly do. Then you have a system for getting it done.
When I was just starting Peloton, all I had to do was clip into the bike. Even today when my brain suggests I’m tired or don’t feel like it, all I have to do is clip in. Once I’m clipped in, I’m taking a ride.
If I’m tired, I might tell myself that maybe I’ll just do a short ride. This usually turns into doing another one until I’ve completed my usual ride time because the beginning is where all the friction is.
My commitment to the system is what keeps me going. My ability to not be seduced by how I might feel in the moment enables the system to function and generates movement toward goals. (Now, I just have to find the right system for my daily writing!)
